
During the final months of Brenda Joyce Tindell’s terminal cancer in 1998 and 1999, Billy Joe Shaver kept his wife fighting for her life by telling her that his late drinking partner, Townes Van Zandt, was waiting for her in heaven.
Shaver and Brenda had already lived three lifetimes together before she fell ill, having married three separate times and divorced twice since meeting in Texas when he was a 20-year-old Navy veteran and she was 16. Over those four decades, nobody tested Brenda’s patience quite like Van Zandt, the fellow Texas troubadour who had first crossed paths with Shaver in the late 1960s around Houston’s Old Quarter club before both men drifted into the 1970s Nashville songwriting circuit.
When Shaver broke through in 1973 after Waylon Jennings recorded ten of his songs for the outlaw country landmark *Honky Tonk Heroes*—including “You Asked Me To,” a devotion song written for Brenda—the newfound royalties brought the family back together in Tennessee. Brenda moved to Nashville with their young son, Eddy, and remarried Shaver, hoping the steady publishing income meant a settled home life.
Instead, the 1970s road years turned into a blur of multi-day disappearing acts across Texas and Tennessee, with Van Zandt frequently at the center of the trouble. Whether the two songwriters were trading verses at Nashville’s Exit/In, drinking through Houston, or hanging around Kerrville, a knock on the door or a phone call from Van Zandt usually meant Shaver would not be coming home for days.
As Shaver later admitted in interviews and in his 2005 memoir, *Honky Tonk Hero*, Brenda hated Van Zandt with a passion and saw him as pure trouble every time he came near their house. Those alcohol-fueled binges and long stretches away from home tore up their second marriage, eventually driving Shaver to a breakdown in the late 1970s before he sobered up and tried to piece his family back together.
Even after Van Zandt died on New Year’s Day 1997 at age 52, Brenda never softened her opinion of the man who had pulled her husband into so many lost weekends. Later that same year, after doctors discovered that Brenda’s cancer had become terminal, Shaver married her for a third time, cleared his touring schedule, and brought her back to their modest home on the outskirts of Waco so he and Eddy could care for her themselves.
For the next two years, Shaver stayed by her bed and handled her daily nursing care with his own scarred right hand. As the illness progressed in 1999 and her breathing grew shallow, there were nights in the Waco house when Brenda drifted out of consciousness and appeared close to slipping away.
Knowing his wife’s stubborn streak better than any doctor, Shaver leaned down beside her pillow whenever she started fading and told her that if she gave up now, Van Zandt was standing right inside the pearly gates waiting to welcome her.
The warning worked more than once. Even when she was exhausted and barely responsive, the thought of having to deal with her husband’s old running buddy on the other side was enough to make Brenda open her eyes, rally her strength, and stay in that Waco bedroom with Billy Joe and Eddy for a few more months.
Brenda died on July 30, 1999, at age 54, with both her husband and her son beside her. Over the next twenty-one years on the road, Shaver kept telling that bedside story from the stage until October 2020, when he was laid to rest at age 81 in Waco’s Oakwood Cemetery right beside the woman who had stayed awake just a little longer to avoid Townes Van Zandt.